Paralyzed with Indecision? Here Are Some Tips!

Indecision often stems from fear—fear of making the wrong choice, fear of disappointment, or fear of what others might think. Identifying the root cause of your indecision is crucial. For many years, I was operating under the belief that one wrong decision would set off a chain of unfortunate events in my life.

This fear originated in my youth under the guise of following "God's will" for my life. To clarify, there's nothing wrong with seeking spiritual guidance or counsel; however, there is something wrong with constantly feeling unequipped to make choices, particularly as an adult. Whether directly or indirectly, I learned that I just had to do what God told me to do without question. I understood that what I wanted didn't matter because, as a "child of God," I had to follow His will. As a result, I felt disempowered to explore my personal desires or exercise my free will. When I left the church and decided not to follow God anymore, I became further paralyzed with indecision, constantly waiting for someone to validate my choices. Even when I had the knowledge or experience to make sound decisions for my life, I always felt the need for a co-signer.

After many years of indecision, I realized that no one would be more equipped to make choices for my life but me—I knew myself best. As cheesy as this sounds, through personal development I began to learn my likes, dislikes, values, and interests outside of the purview of the church and outside influences. Once I got to know myself, I knew what I wanted, but I lacked the confidence to proceed. As I reverted back to some of my spiritual beliefs, I learned that even the characters in the Bible had to take initiative and make choices; they didn't always wait around for a sign from the heavens. God taught me that I couldn't live in fear and had to exercise some faith while applying what I already knew. I began to utilize the tools I had acquired over the years, and I'll list some of them for you below:

Know Thy Self:

Self-awareness is very important in making decisions. Learning your personal wants, knowing your character, learning how to listen to your gut instincts, and being sure of your values and what drives you all help narrow down the decision-making process by highlighting your true desires before you are inundated with outside voices.

Pros & Cons List:

I love lists, and I use them in everything. Pros and cons lists help me organize my thoughts. I'm a big-picture kind of girl, so I like to have a bird's-eye view, and I believe a pros and cons list gives me that perspective.

Move Forward in Peace & With Faith:

Make a decision confidently and have faith that you made the best decision for yourself in the moment with the information you had. You can always change your mind in the future and have faith that you have the ability to pivot, should you need to. It's likely not the end of the world and you're more adaptable than you know, so be compassionate with yourself and choose peace and faith over fear.